been that long since died. Father's Day (June 19, 2011) was barely 2.5 months ago. My emotions are all out of whack. The nightmares are coming back. I cry out of nowhere. I know i'm not the same. More and more people say I'm mean, careless, cruel to an extent just because I no longer entertain the crap people say and do. I don't feel like the person I was before he died. I feel like a large part of me died with him. :-( how do you began to heal after the person you've planned to spend the rest of your life with dies? I've been very numb to the world since this happened and a part of me wonders if I need to have an emotional / mental break so I can feel and comprehend what's going on with me but i'm too strong to succumb to that. Even the day he died I cried for a second then got myself together because things needed to be done. People needed to be notified, yada yada. I really don't know how I should handle this. I don't know what to feel? I miss him so much. I'm full of angry that he's gone and we never got the chance to begin the life we planned with each other... So much is going on inside of me that I feel like i'm going to explode sometimes. Sigh :-/ How can I live with his death constantly over taking my being?
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